Bob Kilgore - I WORE MY TUX FOR THIS?
Toenails and Thermometers
The Blonde returned from her holiday on Sunday. "Oh Bob, we'll go out to the garden tomorrow!"she said. Monday dawned and at the crack of 10 am she packed me in the duffel bag and carried me to the office of highest discomfort. Imagine my dismay when the, otherwise nice, tech pulled out the Vaseline and placed a thermometer in my tush. Followed by many queries thereafter, "Why so grumpy today Bob?" Why indeed.
- Bob Kilgore
11 April 23
On Loyalty
I am steadfastly present for The Blonde, rain or shine, no mountain high enough. The dear girl toils on hand and knee, plunging spade to clay, the sweat of her brow giving drink to spring blooms, stones bruising her patella, beautification of her little plot primary in her spring mindset. And I. I remain by her side, diligent in my support, my admiration of her efforts endless. Till the deep cushion on the patio calls me to dimple it’s plush woolsack with my girth. Then deep snooze is preeminent.
-Bob Kilgore
28 Mar 23
.
Day Three of icy confinement with The Blonde and The Big Guy. I have notified the authorities, and put in appropriation for the thaw posthaste. Copious togetherness has resulted in a rash of cabin fever. The humans must vacate the premises.
Bob Kilgore
How the days of January invigorate and revitalize instinctive senses; rendering inherent excitability, on the brink of frenzy. I am challenged to subdue the impetus boiling within.
Bob Kilgore
Awaiting the Jolly Old Elf, I ponder, why the bourgeois torture their progeny with the like of the creepy canard? Poor urchins. Though the filthy creatures deserve a lump of coal, it is my Christmas wish that they all receive a tangerine and a walnut. Greedy little gluttons. A Larking Yule to All.
Bob Kilgore
Don't be a cotton headed ninny muggins. For goodness' sake.
Bob Kilgore
Thwarted at every juncture. I seek to effectuate my role as The Great Hunter. The Blonde denies me and my prey access to my lodge. I abide by her no kill command. Still she abnegates my petition to carry my cricket into my den. I repeat my refrain, yet again. This repression will not stand.
Bob Kilgore
The Blonde deemed it a good day to transport me to have my nails trimmed. I deem it an excellent day for her to make amends for such act. Extra treetz and outside time.
Bob Kilgore
I perceive a stimulating phenomenon regarding polka dots. Something about their very essence makes me feel extraordinarily perky. - Bob Kilgore
The Blonde is prone to a state of dither. Atop the sofa cushion today, I needed to expel a glob of grass that was congealing in my tummy. The horck strayed to the sofa cushions, my blankie, throw pillow and the linen throw. No miscue on my part - still The Blonde shows indication of being in a flap
Bob Kilgore
The Blonde thought it ill-advised that I begin wake up operations at 5:45 this morning. It was pressing that I secure access to The Mildscape to adequately supervise the birdies. I take her grumpy demeanor to be bad form.
Bob Kilgore
Heaven knows I am not one to lose composure. However, the taedium vitae of The Blonde's afternoon hemming project has me in the throes of woe. When can a kitty GO OUTSIDE??
Bob Kilgore
Should The Blonde find herself under the weather, I often find that camping out on her tummy and giving myself a good licking will get her moving again in no time.
Bob Kilgore
Last evening I held Audience. Four loyal subjects were allowed entry. All were aghast when one commoner dared pick me up. In compassion I allowed it. I rather enjoyed the experience. I accepted kisses from the others. I shall consider granting further Audience regularly. First, however, I shall nap
Bob Kilgore
Though I would not boast, there is but one genius in the room. I maintain close proximity so my brilliance may be absorbed.
Bob Kilgore
All that and a bag of chips.
Bob Kilgore
Snow daze are hard on my nerves. I may require additional nappage. - Bob Kilgore
5 Year Anniversary with The Blonde & The Big Guy. It seems we have reached an international pinnacle, a watershed of epic proportion. I shall keep them and accept their boundless love and ministrations.
Bob Kilgore, 2022
The Blonde is in the throes of January Blahs. She has scoured the house of Christmas, but for the wreath on the portal. I resignedly await the changing of my tie to one more seasonably correct. Indubitably, she will soon attend to my needs.
Bob Kilgore
I can't help but excogitate that the Jolly Old Elf would arrive more expeditiously, should The Blonde cease lying on the carpet with her blasted camera, and go to bed. To All A Good Night.
Bob Kilgore
